Having an honest conversation about the issues we’re seeing today requires confronting the hard facts of privilege and how it works.

“Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen.” Hebrews 11:1 (NKJV)

This is one of my favorite verses in the Bible. As a parent it is also my wish for my 5-year-old son. I have faith that everything I hope for, everything that I do not currently see in this country, will be available to him. At the top of the list of things I hope for is a long life.

2020欧洲杯体育足球比分网We are black, and what has been evident in the last 2 weeks, is that our blackness is a liability. It is a hazard to our lives, to our ability to freely draw breath, without being questioned or killed because of it.

2020欧洲杯体育足球比分网While I am very aware of this fact, my son is not, and yet one day soon, rather than later, he will need to know. He will need to know the rules of his duality — of the double-consciousness — he must keep in an effort to survive.

So, how do I have the conversation? How does any parent have this conversation with their child? How do we broach a subject that is evolving with every new death, for every benign and innocuous activity that would result in such desperately different outcomes if the melanin in the skin of the victims were turned down to barely have tint?

2020欧洲杯体育足球比分网 it seems our country is there again. Instead of black people being dragged from their homes and hung from large trees in public squares in a lynching party, we are now shot dead in our own homes, in our churches, in our cars, in front of our children, and much, much more.

For black families having the talk 2020欧洲杯体育足球比分网about race and racism with their children there is a precarious balance we must strike between instilling reality and trying not to raise a generation who live in fear.

For white families having the talk2020欧洲杯体育足球比分网, you must first understand history and the social structures you were born into and benefit from because of the privilege of your skin color. Then work lies in reconciling these things without being dismissive, defensive, or so laden with guilt you become apathetic — or worse, so distraught you can’t focus outside yourself.

2020欧洲杯体育足球比分网Harvey said, “White defensiveness is huge, sometimes it’s because we don’t care and that’s a problem, and sometimes it’s because we don’t know what to do with our guilt . . . [We] don’t always have to feel guilty. We can actually join in and take action as allies in anti-racist struggles.”

For help knowing what to say…

Healthline has compiled a list of anti-racism resources for parents and kids2020欧洲杯体育足球比分网. We update it regularly, and we encourage parents to further their own education on how to raise inclusive, just, and anti-racist children.

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, , and . Nikesha lives in Jacksonville, Florida, but you can always find her online at contact@newwrites.com, or @Nikesha_Elise on Twitter and Instagram.